Muddy Pond-erings :)

Grayson and his buddy Caleb on last day of school

Season's last day of school

One thing that I have learned from our first year of public school is that I do not want to go back to work (doesn't mean I won't in the future, but I don't want to nonetheless). I am able to be at the school whenever I'm needed or want to be or Season wants me to be there. I have no guilt whatsoever, and I never have to okay my leaving with anybody else. I would like to say I never feel rushed, but I do everything in a rush at the last minute. It's how I function. But, I very rarely feel stressed, overwhelmed, or pulled in too many directions. I feel peace. Are we busy? Probably not in comparison to most families. And we love it! But we have our weeks where we say okay we gotta slow down. And we do. We can. Because I don't have to go to work. I can be at home to "settle down" life and readjust the tone of our home. My husband (and me too for the most part) thrives on simplicity. Too much business goin' on and he is out. And in my opinion, most children are that way, too.
I am presently watching my kids swim in the muddy pond behind our house. No electronic devices, no fancy shmancy water slides, no money spent. Just give 'em a stick, a jumper cable, and a plastic sled, and they are completely joyous in it. I often struggle with wondering if I am doing God's will, or wondering how I can be absolutely purposeful for Him throughout my day. But at this moment--I know I am right where I'm supposed to be, doing exactly what He wants me to. Nothing else is competing for my time--no job, no prior commitments, no computer, no TV, no meaningless daily task--just my kids, my pen, my thoughts, and His awesome presence.

Proof of Life

Last night I woke to the hum of nothingness, and felt an urgency to check on my baby (my almost 4-year-old baby sob sob). He was sleeping so soundly that he wasn't making a noise, nor stirring a muscle. So soundly, that for an instant I thought he wasn't breathing at all. I had to place my hand on his bare little chest to feel the in and out of his breath. I had to have proof. Relief instantly overcame fear in knowing, without a doubt, life was flowing through his veins.

This made me wonder if God can see the in and out of His breath in me. Are there times that I do not appear spiritually alive to Him? Does He have to search for proof of His Life in me? Ouch.

His life visibly flowing through us for His glory. Be Proof of Life to the World.

2 Corinthians 4: 10-11
We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus' sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body.

Brief Family Summary (in order to start this blog afresh)

Graham is presently enjoying work that requires no thought, only the sweat of his brow and his (awesome) manly muscles. He is daily learning to surrender control to God, in realization that his plans are nothing in light of our Creator. He finds much joy in Grayson being his constant shadow, in watching his little girl play ball, and in his wife keeping his house clean and dinner on his table :) He dislikes stupid television, reading any book other than the Bible, and clutter. He is busy creating various house plans, helping different people, and providing a wonderful life for his family. Summer is presently enjoying the daily tasks of being mom to her two quickly-growing children and wife to her man, and living a simple life. She is trying to learn to love like Jesus, increase productivity in day-to-day life, and to stop hesitating when God says to Move. She finds much joy in the silly things her kids do everyday, random kindnesses from friends and family, and truly feeling the presence of God. She dislikes going to Wal-Mart, not having a good book to read, and living in Texas in the summertime. She is busy trying to keep the floor clean, figuring out how to get things done with the least amount of effort (lol), and spending too much time on the computer! Season is presently enjoying being mommy to her babydoll Skylar, getting ready for dance recital, eating lunch with Aunt Mally at school everyday, and swimming in the muddy tank in the backyard. She is learning that life is not fair, sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do, and to trust Mom, Dad, and God. She finds much joy in doing tricks on the trampoline, tagging out girls on the tball field, and Tuesdays with Granna and cousin Azlyn. She dislikes not getting what she wants, computer class, and getting poison ivy all the time. She is busy hording stuff in her bed, pretending to be her brother's teacher, and watching too much TV.
Grayson is presently enjoying everything he can to the fullest! He is learning to be patient, his ABC's, to spell his name, how to be a real man. He finds much joy in being with his daddy and pappy and his best bud Caleb, sharing affection with those he loves, talking very loudly, and in kicking the cat. He dislikes washing his hair, drinking water, not getting a prize at Wal-Mart, and being disciplined. He is busy cutting down trees with his loppers, getting as dirty as possible, making his family laugh, irritating his sister, and burning brush with his dad.

My Valentine (yes, a few days late, so what!)

I am continually humbled by the fact that God answered my prayers for my husband. Graham has always been a good man, but now he is a New Man. I am not an emotional girl, but my heart seriously overflows with gratefulness, unworthiness, and a deep desire that all marriages can be genuinely rooted in God. I write not to boast in Graham, but to boast only in the Lord, who had mercy on us both.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!

2 Corinthians 5:17

The new man leads his family to church. He models the love of Jesus. He does not seek his own glory. The new man asks for forgiveness when he is wrong. He extends mercy to his wife when she fails. He leads his daughter in prayer when she is afraid. The new man encourages his son to seek God and not the things of this world. He sets the Word of God as his standard. The new man runs to the peace of God, not the temorary escape of this world. He loves to guide conversations to God, and enjoys the company of like-minded friends and family. The new man encourages his wife to feed her spirit, not her flesh (which, honestly, she would rather not hear, lol). He realizes his own stength is not enough, and knows he is nothing without Christ. He inspires little children to be passionate about the Lord, and feels compassion for the lost. The new man humbles himself before the Lord, and does not apologize for his sensitivity to the Spirit. He worships the Lord for his handiwork, and stands in awe of the one true God. He cries out for a pure heart, and knows this world is not his home. The new man realizes that God's ways are much higher than his own, and is willing to go against the flow in obedience to Him. He admits when he has stepped outside of God's will, and feels repentant for doing so. He devours the Word for wisdom, passionate about storing it in his heart. The new man does not seek wealth from this world, but desires to store up treasures in heaven. He doesn't always get it right, but ultimately knows that his Victory is in the Lord. The new man sees with His eyes, tries to be God's hands, and loves unconditionally. He plans with diligence, pursues righteousness, craves unity, wants more than anything to see His glory known. He is my Psalm 1 man. And I, I am learning to lean on him as God's covering for me, and I love him much more than I can express.

Graham and I are loving this song lately. Our praise team sings it at church, and they do an awesome job of it. And now they play Michael W. Smith's version of it on Klove all the time. We can't get enough of it. The lyrics are powerful. You can't hear it and not worship Him. My God is mighty to save, Author of my salvation. He conquered the grave! He is the hope of the nations. He takes me as I am, all my stinkin' fears and failures. I love the end of the song, picturing that one of these days we really will be gathered around His throne, all of us, all nations, singing for the glory of the Risen King.

Zephaniah 3: 16-17 "Do not fear, O Zion; do not let your hands hang limp. The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing."

My life is over...

....or half-over rather. Today my man described me as "middle-aged." Really? Middle aged? I will not claim that. thankyouverymuch.

Living and Active

Isaiah 40:28-31

"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."

The Truth. My Life Sustained. Scriptures that I've heard since before I could read them for myself. How is it that they continue to give me encouragement and strength? How is that His Word continues to convict and break my heart? I've always questioned how. "Child-like faith" has never come easily to me. Luckily the Lord totally gets my skepticism and accepts me just the same. He teaches me to be at peace with questions that have no earthly answer. So, we Continue to hope in the Lord. Continue to Run. Because, Hello? Don't you know? Haven't you heard? My God is everlasting. He doesn't grow tired of me. My weak faith does not make Him weary. He is totally cool with the fact that I can't begin to fathom His understanding.

Thank you God for daily Renewal.

A New Knowing

Who knew a new year would bring so much change? "Not I," said the sickeningly happily married thirty-something mom of two, living contently in a pint-sized Skamper camper that is appropriately decorated inside and out with the shade of dirt. Or is it poop? And did I say contently?
So all the change creates many post-worthy blogs (in my mind atleast), but not really blog-worthy time slots in my schedule as of yet. A month after selling our house and moving everything we own into a still-not-ready-to-live-in quonset barn, whilst we make the Skamper home and bum showers and laundry appliances (and Christmas trees) from sweet family, we are finally beginning to create a new normal for the little Eudey family. Each of us is being stretched, learning lots, digging deep for patience, and holding on to the "light at the end of the tunnel," (as one friend so aptly suggested should be the theme song of the quonset phase of our project.) Of course, the only one of us workin' his buns off is my man. Can I just say that he is awesome? I mean he is putting a roof over my head with his own two hands.
Though the changes have made us closer as a family, both literally and figuratively, my God-time has suffered. Thankfully, His grace and strength are sufficient. I actually did read my Bible Sunday morning (though I skipped church), and found my scripture for the new year. Joel 2:13
says "Rend your heart..." I like that word "rend." It means to tear or split apart. Rend my heart from the world, from my flesh and give it wholly and completely to Him; not just "rend my garments" so others will see and think I'm so "Christian", but to daily with purpose and repentance be broken before my God knowing the mercy and kindness He extends toward inadequate, sinful me. That's my resolution. Change and Rend. Rend and Change.